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#1
05-30-2007, 01:39 AM
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Being punished.
In the last few years of my life so many bad things have happend to me. Mostly having to do with relationships and family. I cant trust anybody at all because my mind just doesnt allow me to.
Its possible that im pushing people away just because I have a 'bad feeling' that the person is doing something behind my back. Nothing more than a feeling... I actually used to pray for God to punish me for all the rotten things I did as a kid.. and now im thinking that punishment is happening. I have one hour or two a day when my mind is completely cleared of all of this and I can just concentrate on what im doing without my mind wandering and telling me someone is doing something behind my back... thats when I exercise and workout. I dont know where this is going... I just needed to write to help me get this pressure off.. Do you think I need to talk to a professional about my problems or do I need to seek out God and ask him to take away the punishment that I myself asked for... or what? 
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#2
05-30-2007, 01:44 AM
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Re: Being punished.
Sounds to me like self (punishment) due to your inability to trust people. This i would see someone about. I don't think God is punishing you but he might be able to help you trust agian. Try asking him this instead of blameing him for your trust issues. Not trying to be rude here just blunt.
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Lo, there do I see my father Lo, there do I see my mother and my sisters and my brothers Lo, there do I see the line of my people back to the beginning Lo, they do call to me They bid me take my place among them in the Halls of Valhalla Where the brave may live Forever. "Either you lift it or you don't." Jesse Dawson Marunde
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#3
05-30-2007, 01:58 AM
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Re: Being punished.
I'm sorry for your problems Speg and I'll be sure to include you in my prayers. Like birthright said, I would also suggest praying to God and having Him help you through your problems (John 15:7).
In a different aspect, I am under the impression that both bodybuilding and being a Christian will naturally isolate you (with lifting you always are alone in the gym and have to eat specific food at specific times, plus you don't drink so thats even less socializing. With Christianity, you set time aside to spend with God and you live by a code of morals that conflicts with the lifestyle of a normal 23 year old.) Its not a bad thing, and actually in the long run, a much better one. but I thing you probally need to assert yourself more with making friends. You will meet some amazing people and it will help to restore your trust in other people. Maybe that helps, Nic
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Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger
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