my girlfriend needs help!!

jestersdead · #1 12-28-2003, 04:04 AM

Ok. heres the deal. my gf has an eating disorder. she is 16 and probably eats about 500 calories a day, or less, in about 2 meals. She is terrified to eat anymore, and is seriously depressed that nothing will work. I have a good knowledge on diet and tactics for guys, ive done the 13 weeks to hard core fat burning and had great results, and im good at creating splits and cardio (for guys at least) but id really apprectiate maybe some female specific help on this issue. What do you think she should do? Obviously she needs to increase her calorie intake and exercise but is tehre anything im leaving out? ANY help would be great!! Thanks guys

Tuf · #2 12-28-2003, 04:54 AM

Hi and welcome to ABC. [img]/forum/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

Unfortunately, with eating disorders, it is not always as easy as telling the person that they need to eat more. There is a very high relapse rate with anorexia, as many people simply cannot tolerate the weight gain, not only mentally but even physically. Eating disorders are often about much more than a desire to be thin, so if you attempt to treat only the dietary aspect, long-term recovery is unlikely. I would suggest encouraging her to see a counselor as well as a doctor. There are psychological and physical repercussions of what is occurring, so it is important for her to have help with both aspects.

ALD4168 · #3 12-28-2003, 09:27 AM

I agree wholeheartedly with Tuf's post. I am a recovering anorexic (I don't think I will ever consider myself completely recovered even though it's been more than 4 years now). I am much healthier now than I was back then, but I couldn't do it by just eating more and exercising. First I had to get past the issues that brought about my eating disorder. Your girlfriend first must have a solid treatment program which in most eating disorder situations includes work on nutrition, exercise and psychological counseling. Now that I have dealt with all the other issues, bodybuilding has kind of become the last stage of my treatment. It helps me to love my body and take care of it and the stronger I get the more I want to take care of my body. In order for that to happen though, I had to get help first. You can't force her to do get help though. Guide her gently and talk to her and really listen, but don't push her too hard. No amount of treatment will help if she's not ready and willing even to commit to getting better. Of course, there will be slip ups along the way, but she has to be the one who wants to get better. Honestly, the most important thing you can do is be there to support her when she finally does get help because it's not an easy road. I hope this helps you.

Fireproof · #4 12-28-2003, 10:35 AM

She really needs to get professional counselling with this disorder. As mentioned above, it's a serious thing and typically someone saying "you should eat like this and exercise like that" isn't going to cut it.

If you do still want advice on ways to increase her calories while minimizing fat gain, then post her stats - height, weight, etc.

Boka · #5 12-28-2003, 10:44 AM

I am studying to be a Social worker and we deal with cases of this nature. She needs counciling and group therapy. This is on of thouse problems that will never go away, it will aways haunt her. Best thing is to seek proffsionals who know how to deal with the problem. Group therapy should be real good because it provides a suport network of people who actualy have lived the problem them selves.

MusicJennifer · #6 12-31-2003, 03:20 PM

Sorry I got onto this late. I am a recovered (for the most part!) bulemic. Eating disorders are serious and can distort a woman's mind to a degree that is so beyond unhealthy. I also was quite depressed and didn't know how to dig myself out. Eventually, I went for professional treatment and began to feel normal again. Every now and then, I'll have a little relapse, but it's VERY rare. Get your girlfriend to a pro. The only thing you can do is love her and support her. Through the therapy, she will figure the rest out on her own [img]/forum/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] I hope I've helped. Feel free to PM me [img]/forum/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]