Erica's first journal...I WILL NOT QUIT - Page 3 - ABCbodybuilding

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  #21  
Old 07-22-2003, 01:32 PM
gamgirl20 gamgirl20 is offline
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Default Re: Erica\'s first journal!!!

Thanks gymkitten. You are really right...it is soo freaking hard. and i have been battling forever. it seems noone understands. even friends of mine just dont get it. they dont workout, eat well, they all smoke and drink all the time. if i try to be healthy they tell me im nuts and that its a waste of time. its hard when im away at school cuz im surrounded by the day in and day out. for awhile i was doing great there.. had lost like 10 lbs. one month doing everything right...i know i was doing it right. and all the sudden i was accused of having an eating disorder. just cuz i went to the gym every day and ate healthy foods and didnt drink every night with them. then all the sudden everyone starts talkinga nd watching my every move. IT SUCKED. i live in a sorority house so word gets around... but now im at home and ever since that incident i am so screwed up and wish i oculd get back into where i was before all the rumors started flying. i was so full of energy and feeling great! now i fee like crap and look like it too. im really trying hard and its going to be real bumpy but im not giving up. and having people like you give it to me straight is exactly what i need and whats going to help me when i want to give up. i really admire all your dedication and cant believe youre even running marathons! man how i wish i could do that. when you were talking about your grandparents that all sounded so familiar because 2 of my grandparents died of the same thing...well and other contributing factors but i definatly dont want to have to go through what i witnessed. it was awful as im sure you know. but anyways i revised what i ate when i came home yesterday...u are not going to be happy-its not a pretty site..yet again another binging session. but i was brave and posted it so i could see it and everyone else could. im not gonna hide it any more. i cant help myself get better if i keep hiding it right? anyways i know this is long. but today is another day and i will not be weak.
  #22  
Old 07-22-2003, 02:13 PM
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Default Re: Erica\'s first journal!!!

I have had a real problem with bingeing (I was bulimic for a couple of years and only started recovering last christmas)- so on top of all that I should have really made more progress (and I do feel a bit hypocritical lecturing you but I'm so keen to help you not to screw up the way I did).
I have learnt the hard way that the key to not bingeing is:

-WATCH your sugar intake. there's no such thing as "just one cake". I know that "just one" sets me off on a cycle of bingeing and feeling awful.

-EAT ENOUGH. I used to be really good all day (ie not eat enough) on top of training, then wonder why I was eating everything in sight by 9pm, then next day feel guilty, go to the gym, eat too little and the whole vicious cycle went round and round again. Space out healthy meals throughout the day. On a good healthy eating plan (don't use the word Diet) you shouldn't really feel hungry. If you're hungry, eat. Just make it a good choice. It's better to snack on prawns or jerky or hard-boiled eggs than cakes and cookies.

-Over-exercising is NOT a subsitute or backpedal for bingeing. It just makes it worse.

-More protein. Protein for breakfast, protein for lunch, protein for dinner and proteiny snacks. Makes you feel full, stops you craving

-Fat IS NOT the work of the devil. Eat good fats like olive oil and Udo's oil and you feel fuller (and my skin and hair are in great condition!). Avoid the crappy fats and sugars in junk food and you'll feel SOOOO much better, believe me.

-Once you have binged, DON'T crash diet the next day. Just get straight back onto your healthy plan. If you binge during the morning or day, don't just write the day off, instead try and have your planned healthy meals and carry on as normal. It's not the end of the world, but by restricting your food or feeling bad, you'll just drive your cravings even more, making it a vicious circle.

-Also, the girls in your house are
a)*****es
b)jealous
c)lazy
d)guilty
No-one likes to see someone out improving themselves, losing weight and getting fitter, it makes them feel guilty and lazy. So they ***** and carp. BUT, that said, make sure you really are eating healthily (remember- never less than 1800-2000 cals per day, ratio of 40:30:30 protein:carb:fat!). If they still *****, then just smile and imagine how fat and ugly they'll look in 15 years time, lugging their fat asses around in horrible sweatpants, with wrinkles from the ciggies and bad teeth [img]/forum/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]
Someone good to talk to about how crap housemates canbe at Uni is Enderwigginout, who's had a tough time from her housemates.

Hope this hhelps, best of luck
  #23  
Old 07-23-2003, 02:53 PM
gamgirl20 gamgirl20 is offline
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Default Re: Erica\'s first journal!!!

LOL thanks for giving me that mental picture of those girls a few years down the road. I had a good laugh. and its so true. when im older and able to still walk and talk without trouble, and they are dealing with sicknesses and being fat maybe they will know that i dont work out and "try" and eat healthy for fun, its to make my body better and to live longer. i feel i am getting a little bit better with my eating habits. i think yesterday was a lot better than i have been. i ate pretty healthy. cept for the snack of pretzles and lite cream cheese... but that was a lot better than the snacks id consumed on previous nights. i know my calories were still not up there...seems like id have to eat a lot! but im tryin. today for breakfast i did bad. i had cereal and skim milk. i know the cereal just has sugars in it but i really needed something more to help me feel better later in the day and i think it might help. once again i want to thank you for all your help and advice. you have no idea how great it is to be able to talk to other people about this stuff and not be embarassed. i really appreciate it.
  #24  
Old 07-24-2003, 01:00 AM
gamgirl20 gamgirl20 is offline
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Default Re: Erica\'s first journal!!!

I think I did well today. Besdies the fact that I may have consumed a little more carbs than protein...but besdies that i feel good about today. what the problem is now are the stress fractures in my shins...how do i do decent cardio when dealing with those. theya re terrible pain!
  #25  
Old 07-24-2003, 04:48 AM
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Default Re: Erica\'s first journal!!!

Try having eggs or oatmeal for breakfast, they'll keep you going for longer than cereal.
Glad to hear things are improving. I swear, you really do have to eat tons if it's healthy, just to get your cals up to a good level. At the moment, don't worry about how much you're eating, just worry about WHAT you're eating. If you want to snack, then snack but make it a really good choice.
Try and cut down on sugars and refined carbs (white flour and baked things etc). Try snacking on tuna, cottage cheese, lean ham, hard boiled eggs. If you must have bread, make it whole wheat (tastes sooo much better too!), or fruit and salad. You can have a couple of tablespoons of PB even! (try and get natural PB, or at least stuff without added sweeteners like sugar or fruit juices- check labels carefully!!).

Once you get kifting heavy, doing a bit of cardio and eating the right foods, your metabolism will really kcik in to become efficient and fatburning. You can't do it if youre starving or just feeding it crappy sugars all the time. Just bear that in mind [img]/forum/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

Glad to hear things are going better. How's your gym stuff going?
  #26  
Old 07-24-2003, 01:17 PM
gamgirl20 gamgirl20 is offline
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Default Re: Erica\'s first journal!!!

the gym was going p[retty well until my stress fractures got even worse. i was running last night and they hurt so bad my legs almost gave out..so i tried walking.. couldnt even do that... i had only been going for 10 min...really pissed me off. so i went and did hte stationary bike.. any other suggestions for cardio since running/walkngs outs for awhile? heres what i did for lifting last night:

leg extenstion 3x10x40
hamstring curl 3x10x40
calf raises 3x10x150
another calf machine 2x8x200
inner thigh 3x10x65
outer thigh 3x10x55
  #27  
Old 07-26-2003, 12:03 AM
gamgirl20 gamgirl20 is offline
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Default Re: Erica\'s first journal!!!

my shins hurt so bad and i know i have to let them heal or theyll get worse but i feel like i cant do anything productive. i totally took today off from cardio and lifting...first time in like 2 or 3 weeks from doing abs. nothing... goal for tommorrow is to get up SUPER early...hit the gym hard..and get back before my mom starts freaking out on me... tommorrows my sisters grad. party so it means EVERYTHING must be spottless and we must d3evote all our time to it... i made the mistake of going yestrtday... was told that all i care about is going to the gym... got real mad about that one..now im getting guilt trips about going to the gym from my MOM.. grrrr can we say selfish... anyways gotta get there before everyones awake.. god i hope i can do it!
  #28  
Old 07-27-2003, 01:59 PM
gamgirl20 gamgirl20 is offline
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Default Re: Erica\'s first journal!!!

I WAS SO BAD YESTERDAY! drank way too much... prety much tahts the only way i got my calories in was from alcohol.. and cake of course. was my sisters grad. party and when the parents are buying all the alcohol...that means im taking advantage of it.. plus havent drank since i got out of school 2 months ago so i needed it [img]/forum/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] i know no excuse....BUT before i started out the day i DID wake up early and hit the gym...shin splints and all... i walked for an hour on the tread mill at a pace of 4.0-4.3 mph...depending on how much pain i started feeling as i walked faster... the machine said i burned like 500 cal...dunno if its at all right but sure felt like it. i felt real good and wasnt in TOO much pain afterwards.. then i went and did some abs and then went on home to help decorate. but anyways yeah i ate hardly anything with the exception of a drumstick of chicken, piece of cake (had strawberries in it), and some cheetos later on as i got the drunken munchies...but other than that its scary to think that i consumed like 2000 calories worth of alcohol... almost wished i had thrown up or something lol but sadly i can still tolerate ungodly amounts... what college will do to a girl... anyways woke up today feeling pretty queasy in the stomach and had to eat something with substance so i had cereal then saw that it was only like 6 am so i went back to sleep... just woke up starving like 30 min ago and was bad...had 2 pieces of last nights chicken and a cinnamon roll... i feel much better now that i actually have good in me... but the guilts making me pissed... i was doing so well and i blew it these last 2 days... is there some sort of detox u guys know of?? lol or do i have to just get back to normal and kind of forget the whole thing ever happened...
  #29  
Old 07-27-2003, 07:36 PM
schless schless is offline
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Default Re: Erica\'s first journal!!!

GymKitten, here's one of Krypto's pearls of wisdom that you might have been referring to in one of your above posts (good advice, btw! [img]/forum/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] )

Cutting & Training 101: A Beginner's Guide

And Gamgrl - keep on journaling! You're gonna learn so much here. As long as you apply yourself and take the suggestions of the more seasoned folks on this site, you will reach your goals!
  #30  
Old 07-27-2003, 10:51 PM
gamgirl20 gamgirl20 is offline
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Default Re: Erica\'s first journal!!!

thanks so much. that was really helpful!
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