Why'd ya ask if ya didn't want to know?!--Funny I hope! - ABCbodybuilding

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  #1  
Old 04-03-2003, 02:40 AM
enderwigginout enderwigginout is offline
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Default Why\'d ya ask if ya didn\'t want to know?!--Funny I hope!

Okay, TWICE I've lost this post!!!

Basically: This chick I live with has repeatedly bugged me about helping her with her training program, especially with showing her around the weight room. I told her that I'm basically a beginner myself but I'd be happy to go with her and help her out as much as I can.

She never really listens to what I have to say, but I'm always trying. Here is a brief recap of our last convo today. Hope its funny for ya! Let me know if I've said anything wrong or misleading cuz I'm still learning myself!

"Can you help me with my training program?"

"Yeah, sure I'm not busy. Shoot."

"Well, I love my cardio and still want to do all 5 days, but I found this training program that is 4 days a week."

"4 days?"

"Yeah. I want to do Friday/Saturday/Sunday/Monday. Is that okay?"

"Not really. You want to space them out more. Your muscles need time to recover."

"Oh but its not heavy lifting like yours."

"Well, I'd still space them out more. Every other day at least."

"Oh but I'm so busy I have to do both weekend days."

"I still think they should be spaced out more, but if its low weight stuff maybe its okay I guess. But if I were you I'd cut out some of the cardio and just lift heavy and eat. You'll build muscle that way and then you can just cut. 4 days is kind of a lot just timewise."

"Oh but, its not like your kind of weight training. I found it in Shape."

"Well, chances are its low weight high rep and that's kinda pointless. It may build your endurance but it isn't going to build much muscle."

"I don't want to get bulky."

"You won't get bulky. It takes a very long time for women to gain mass. Chances are the girl in the pictures for this training program you're talking about lifts heavy. You can't get her results by doing that program."

"She doesn't look bulky. I have more muscle tone than her." (Turns out there was a misunderstanding here, you'll understand in a minute). She lifts her sleeve and flexes. She does actually have a nice amount of muscle from her tai chi classes. She's thinner than normal but could still loose 5 pounds, less than ten, just a little overall fat (NOT that she needs to at all, don't get me wrong) that is covering her muscle, but I don't think she really needs to. I thought about telling her to just drop her weight some and they'd show better, but I think she'd go about it totally the wrong way and loose a lot of the muscle she does have, so I kept my mouth shut (she's all for high carb low fat diets and cutting cals). I also don't know about her nutrition NOW, so like I said, I kept quiet.

So at this point I ask her what she wants out of her training program. She had been saying she wanted to loose some weight, gain some muscle, and improve her bones (I'm taking this to mean bone density). And kept being wishy-washy everytime I tried to pin her down on one goal, so I blunty ask her what she wants to do.

Her reply: "All of it."

"It doesn't work like that. What is your priority?"

"All of it."

So, I tell her that it may work in the beginning because her muscles will be learning the movements and with a bit of increased activity she may burn a little bit of fat, so she might see this at the very very beginning, but soon that would plateau (very soon I would think since she already has some muscle). Basically she would have to choose one main goal.

I told her more about what I'm doing. Like how I'd LOVE to loose fifteen pounds or so right now, but I'm trying to gain muscle mass so I'm eating above maintainance. After I've gained about 10# of muscle, I'll cut down to about 18% bf, right before you start seeing a six pack.

"Oh I don't want to do all that stuff. That's too serious for me."

"Well, I don't really know how to advise you. Did you go to that website I told you about last week?" I turned her on to bodybuilding.com (not this one cuz I ***** about all my roomies and private things on this one [img]/forum/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img] AND this place is too hardcore and would scare her off). I had thought maybe someone would help her out with something feasible or at least back up what I was saying last week (which was the same thing). So, I had gone to all the trouble to show her where the forums were and where the search engine was for training programs. Did she look at it?

"Oh I didn't have time."

So we go to the computer room and I tell her the site again. Then she realizes she has to register first. I go ahead and log her in under my name and she writes two lines before she says, "I don't have time for this right now."

Plllffffffffffttttttttttt...

"I'm sorry, I'm not sure how I can help you."

"Let me go get my magazine!" She runs to get her Shape magazine and I go get my Muscle&Fitness Hers to show her that you DON'T have to get bulky! I show her the cover and a few pics and she goes, "Ew, I don't want to get that bulky." Ummm...*blank stare* that ain't bulky! So she shows me this training program she found. I point out that the chick does in fact look like she trains heavy. From what I could tell the whole program was merely isolation movements.

"Oh I don't want to look like her. I want to look like HER." She proceeds to close the magazine and point to the cover model, an underweight, super tall chick with NO muscle tone AT ALL to her arms. You know the type.

"Well, you do in fact have more muscle tone that she does. But, I hate to say it but you will not look like her through weight lifting. She is a genetic freak." I did not proceed with, to look like her you will have to stop working out and dip down to about 500 cals a day so you loose weight and loose the muscle tone you have right now. Then pass out. Over and over again. Blah. "I doubt she works out at all with weights at all. You already have more muscle tone than she does."

Then I just get tired of dealing with her and I realize she just wants me to tell her it's okay and she'll get fabulous results. So I just merely say, "I'm not sure what to tell you. So why don't you just go ahead and do the program for about 6 weeks, maybe a couple of months, to see if you like it and if you notice any changes. You can always change your program, but you need to give any program 6 weeks or so to notice any changes. Okay?"

Yep it was all she wanted to hear. She smiled and nodded and ran off happy.

Krypto, I love you. Once again, I have a newfound respect for you. It just climbs higher and higher everyday. You deal with this constantly on this site (although I hope most of us aren't as hardheaded)!

I'm too nice. I shouldn't have wasted almost an hour trying to set her straight. Hope this amused everyone. The first two drafts were a lot funnier though and full of much snarkage! I'm just too tired for it right now!
  #2  
Old 04-03-2003, 04:04 AM
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Default Re: Why\'d ya ask if ya didn\'t want to know?!--Funny I hope!



Sounded good to me! Yeah, you could say I've been down that road a few times, lol.

But I'm SURE I was once one of the most hard-headed ones out there, so no worries! [img]/forum/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]
  #3  
Old 04-03-2003, 09:54 AM
soccerchick soccerchick is offline
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Default Re: Why\'d ya ask if ya didn\'t want to know?!--Funny I hope!

haha - i have had that exact conversation with a few on my female friends [img]/forum/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]
  #4  
Old 04-03-2003, 10:06 AM
Elle Elle is offline
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Default Re: Why\'d ya ask if ya didn\'t want to know?!--Funny I hope!

I don't really try anymore...it gets so frustrating! I will talk if they want to listen, but I end up hitting a brick wall....I tell them to go read the BfL book when I get to that point. It's a good starting point for beginners....heck, I did it!
  #5  
Old 04-03-2003, 10:43 AM
lifterchick lifterchick is offline
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Default Re: Why\'d ya ask if ya didn\'t want to know?!--Funny I hope!

Unfortunately, these misconceptions are supported by the media every day. Did anyone catch Oprah yesterday? I saw the commercial showing her lifting weights so I made a point of tuning in. This Bob Greene guy she's got as a trainer- I could just ring his neck. Just a few examples of total myth that were perpetuated on the show:

1. Do cardio before lifting.
2. Stop eating several hours before you go to bed.
3. Being slightly hungry is a good sign- it means your body is dipping into your fat stores.
4. Eat a low fat diet (this one was from one of her "success story" cameos).
5. Eat a big breakfast (okay this is actually good, but Oprah then goes on to say...) a medium sized lunch and a small dinner (and remember- no eating AFTER dinner).
6. Oprah then gushed about how eating such a large breakfast keeps her satisfied until 1 or 2 in the afternoon (so that's like 6-7 hrs. with no food!).

Ughh- it's so frustrating. Millions of women will watch that show and follow the advice because Oprah is doing it. Poor Oprah!!! I actually feel really bad for her. If I thought there was any way she'd actually see it herself I'd email her this site! Can't she look at this guy, whose bicep is about the size of my wrist, and tell that he has no business giving her exercise advice?? Let me tell you, if I was paying a personal trainer and a personal chef what she's been paying these jokers for ten years- and I still looked like that- I'd fire their arses so fast you wouldn't even be able to say "pink slip"!!

But Ender- this is what people like your roomate are listening to. They are being misled, and there are very few celebrities out there to present the truth, and because of their visibility that's who people turn to. In fact, besides Arnold, I can't think of one celebrity whose nutrition and training program I would recommend. Can you? All you can do is lead by example I guess, and thank the Lord you're not stuck in that web of misinformation anymore.

Hey, maybe we should organize a group of us to get together and try to get on the Oprah show so we can present the TRUTH, the WHOLE truth, and NOTHING BUT the TRUTH (so help us, Krypto [img]/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img])!!
  #6  
Old 04-03-2003, 10:48 AM
soccerchick soccerchick is offline
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Default Re: Why\'d ya ask if ya didn\'t want to know?!--Funny I hope!

i see that oprah show a few months ago and was so frustrated by it. [img]/forum/images/graemlins/mad.gif[/img]
  #7  
Old 04-03-2003, 01:25 PM
Bladezz33 Bladezz33 is offline
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Default Re: Why\'d ya ask if ya didn\'t want to know?!--Funny I hope!

I for one can say it is NOT easy... It takes dedication, meal planning, training, tweaks, diet tweaks... and you have to really be into "making a change of lifestyle" when you get into bodybuilding.

I know that now and I am a still a newbie [img]/forum/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

I am also hard-headed....

But I got over it here...a little?
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  #8  
Old 04-03-2003, 01:30 PM
Bladezz33 Bladezz33 is offline
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Default Re: Why\'d ya ask if ya didn\'t want to know?!--Funny I hope!

P.S.

I just wanted to add that if I make any decisions on my diet or training, I dont even look in magazines or shows anymore for advice (although I do subscribe to Muscle) I COME HERE!!!

wooohooo for ABC!
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  #9  
Old 04-03-2003, 11:09 PM
enderwigginout enderwigginout is offline
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Default Re: Why\'d ya ask if ya didn\'t want to know?!--Funny I hope!

It just sucks because if I was given the correct info when I was lifting the first time (or even before then) I would have listened and done my own research and tried to learn!

Ugh...oh well. I hope it was amusing anyway to you guys!
  #10  
Old 04-04-2003, 12:08 AM
konaforever konaforever is offline
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Default Re: Why\'d ya ask if ya didn\'t want to know?!--Funny I hope!

wow. longest post ever! funny and interesting though.:-)
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